Lent Reflections
“Do not judge, so that you will not be judged. For in the ways you judge you will be judged; and by your standard of measure it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck in that is in your brother’s eye, but not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye; and look, the log is in your own eye. You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.” (Matthew 7:1-5)
In my younger spiritual journey, I thought this passage was an exhortation about God’s judgment when we didn’t love well. However, as I’ve grown in my knowledge of God (who is Love) and humans, I believe this interpretation misses the point. Instead, I think Jesus’ words are about posturing our hearts away from judgment toward love. This shift has the ability to move us toward one another in connection rather than disconnection.
In a neurobiological framework, our minds don’t hold love and judgment equally. Without awareness, judgment overshadows love every time because it’s part of our survival mechanism that unconsciously identifies a relational threat. This mechanism, like an airport scanner and metal, “buzzes” when we encounter someone “not like me.” This buzzing puts us immediately on alert to defend ourselves against this “other” which will provoke negative feelings like criticism unless we can pause and see ourselves in the other, recognizing it as the false alarm it is. (Examine implicit bias research)
Jesus invites us to own our flaws so we may continue to connect and be slow to posture ourselves defensively against others. When we live with disgust and criticism, we get a “double whammy” – being removed from God’s love as well as being unable to fulfill God’s commandment – to love Him with our heart, soul and mind and our neighbor as ourselves.
This happens because love, when activated in our brain, operates only when we feel relationally safe. Relational safety is co-created between nervous systems – me and you as well as the broader community. Criticism is absent. (I don’t believe Jesus is saying here we can’t confront our neighbor. In fact, other passages suggests otherwise but it must be done with love.”)
I believe there’s another layer here, when we see our own flaws and address them with compassion rather than an internal harsh judge, we’re able to authentically offer compassion to our neighbor. The neuroscience suggests if we’re harsh toward ourselves, our internal thoughts, regardless of outward expressions, are absent of compassion toward our neighbor. (See Kristin Neff’s research)
Jesus’ ministry on earth exposed that under the right circumstances, our hearts can be betrayed by hate and judgment so that who we believe we’re defending (God) is in fact the one we’re harming (Also God). The Jews expected a king. Jesus came as a servant who humanized the marginalized, who dined with and invited the voices of the oppressed, the untouchables, the discarded. He knew firsthand the cost to be the neighbor looked upon with disgust and contempt, spit on, whipped, mocked and finally nailed to a cross. If you’re marginalized and judged, bring your burden to Jesus. He suffered in the same way.
May we all heed Christ’s invitation, “Look up. Take the log out of your own eye. Behold Jesus carried your log in the form of a cross so you now receive God’s full measure of grace and love. It’s a daily offering so “you might be fit to offer a washcloth to your neighbor.” (The Message translation)